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Let’s Be Clear: 4 Tips on How to Visualize Our Desires
the Imagine Team • August 14, 2020
Achieving our desires is not an over-night process. But even amid a pandemic, it’s something we can still invest some energy into.
There are so many good reasons to be clear about the positive things we wish for, but one surpasses them all. In short, visualizing our desires helps them come true.
We are very skilled at describing our reality as we perceive it. Each of us can easily draw a detailed picture of our family, home and social life, just as we currently see them. The same goes for kids. They can give a very quick description of the way things are: “A, B and C are my friends. D, E and F are not.” Simple. That’s just the way it is. But how would you like it to be?
When a person is making an observation about their reality, it’s the perfect time for them to further envision how they’d actually like it to be. The message here is plain: Don’t stop after realizing the “what is.” Keep thinking about how you want things to be. Our desired reality, many times, is a whole different story than our current one.
We have a natural tendency to focus on our perception of “what is” and accept it as a given fact. Obviously, that perception derives from the many factors and experiences in our lives and is part of the ongoing mental chatter happening in our minds.
But what if we are not completely satisfied with how things are?
It is said that our thoughts create reality. To me, this sounds like an invitation to get creative in visualizing the reality that you really want.
So, here are 4 Guided Imagery tips on how to do that. These are relevant for both adults and kids:
1. Think of a desire you have in any area of your life. Try not to limit yourself on what you think you could achieve, and focus on what you truly want.
2. Try to be as general as you can, concentrating more on the way you want it to feel and less on the details involved.
For example, instead of “I want this specific job,” think in terms of how you want your job to make you feel
(appreciated, inspired, productive, etc.) regardless of which job it may be.
For kids, instead of “I want D, E and F to be my friends,” suggest that your child envision how he or she would like to feel when surrounded with friends
(loved, wanted, accepted as is).
Focusing on the good feelings we get from a desired reality and keeping it general helps us release any resistance we may have
towards moving in the right direction.
Resistance can get tricky. We are not always aware of how powerful it can be. It may come in the form of demotivating self-doubts such as “Why would they pick me for the job?” or, in the kids’ example, “Why would D, E and F want to become friends with me?”
When our attention is on the good feelings involved, it lowers the chance of our own resistance creeping in and ruining the show.
3. Once you have these good feelings envisioned, stay with them just a little more, noticing your mental experience and how your body feels as you imagine them. Allow yourself to engage in these positive emotions as if they are absorbing into you.
4. Once you have done that – stop!! This is a bit surprising right? But it’s just as important as any of the other tips. You want to keep it short, simple and joyful. Overthinking things might give way for the resistance trap to bring down all that fun. It also creates a confused message about what we want.
Guided Imagery can be very useful in setting new goals and progressing towards their achievement. When we empower ourselves by visualizing what we want and the good feelings that come with it, we take the first necessary step on our way there. Envision your desires as if they’ve already been realized and focus on how great that makes you feel – as simple as it sounds, this is actually a powerful tool.
So, the next time you find yourself, or maybe even your kids, observing the “what is,” don’t let it stop there. When our minds have a clear vision of how we want things to be, and especially, how we want to feel, that sends out an equally clear message – to ourselves and to the universe. ;)
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In my last blog I discussed the everyday challenge of going to sleep and how a simple bedtime routine can be a HUGE help. So now a little more into detail with these great ways to make it work! Phase One – Taking Care of the Body Try dedicating the first 10 minutes of the routine to basic actions that prepare the body for hopping into bed, such as brushing teeth, getting into pjs, and snagging a glass of water. Do your best to make sure these happen at about the same time and, if possible, in the same order. And don’t forget to include a cut-off time for electronics – at least 30 minutes before it’s time to fall asleep. Blue light has been shown to limit production of melatonin, a hormone that’s key to maintaining a healthy sleep cycle. Avoiding electronics right before bedtime will help kids fall asleep faster and wake up feeling rested. Once all of this is out of the way, you can move on to the next phase of the routine. Phase Two – Taking Care of the Heart and Mind The second phase, in my opinion, is the best part of the routine, and it actually offers a priceless opportunity for you to create a 100% nurturing experience for your kids . In fact, the content you pour into the next 10 minutes or so will have a life-long effect on them. There are a ton of different things you can do to treasure your time together. You can… Read a book Take turns saying things you’re grateful for Talk about the good things that happened that day Sing a song or say a prayer Say goodnight to family members, friends, the moon, the stars, the birds, or even the trees outside The Guided Imagery Meditation Option If you haven’t before, you could also give guided imagery meditation a try! You might be surprised how fun and calming it is to visualize a pleasant scene as if you’re part of it. There are many different types of meditation you can do depending on your preference: breathing practice, progressive relaxation, mindfulness meditation focused on the five senses, landscape visualization, self-esteem exercises… And the list goes on! Get started with one of my guided imagery meditation scripts: The Protection Bubble . Then you can branch out based on your success. (Many of my customers swear by bedtime meditation!) Keep it short so bedtime remains as consistent as possible, but don’t be in a hurry. Above all, make sure to be present. These are some of life’s most precious moments, so just relax into the bonding experience. The more you give, the more you’ll receive during these positive, soothing 10 minutes. Oh, and try not to blink… They’ll be all grown-up so fast! :)
“My kids always go to sleep so nice and easy!” said no parent ever. Getting your kids to go to sleep every night can be quite difficult, wouldn’t you agree? When my kids were young, I used to feel like I could fall asleep a hundred times before they ever did. And by the time the house was quiet, I was running on fumes. The Challenge – Encouraging the Kids to Sleep Unfortunately, falling asleep is not something that children can do on command, and it can get frustrating for all parties involved when they struggle with bedtime. The good news is that following a regular bedtime routine can turn that difficulty into willingness and even, dare I say, anticipation. Not only does a solid routine help to bring each day to a close in a positive way, but it also contributes to better sleep at night. This will have a great impact on your children’s health and well-being, not to mention your own... Still skeptical that it’s even possible? Perhaps that’s because you’ve never given guided meditation a try. ;) But before we get into that, let’s talk a little bit about the basics of bedtime. The Road to Success – Creating a 20-minute Bedtime Routine All good bedtime routines are built on a few similar and repetitive activities that occur every night at around the same time. But making the routine predictable does not mean it has to be dull (even though that can help with the process of winding down). The magic lies in creating a familiar and foreseeable space that kids associate with going to sleep. This provides young, active kids with a sense of security that gradually allows them to let go of the day and welcome a good night. Best of all, a bedtime routine doesn’t need to be long! About 20 minutes will do for a soft landing :) In my next blog - an easy two-phase process for a successful and fun bedtime routine.
“ I am smart and capable. I am kind. I am confident. ” Could something so simple actually work? Absolutely, yes! And when it comes to managing thoughts and feelings, it doesn’t get much easier than positive affirmations. What Are Positive Affirmations Positive affirmations are simple, short sentences with motivating or reassuring content that you can repeat to yourself in order to improve your mood or mindset. An easy yet powerful stress management tool, positive affirmations can be applied to any aspect of life to increase your confidence and help you feel good. When used often enough, they can have a real and lasting effect on the way you naturally think and behave. Tips to Maximize Your Affirmations Say the words “I am” in your positive affirmations. Doing so helps to create a more favorable state of mind – one in which you feel connected to the emotions you want to promote. Focus on the present. Sticking to present-tense statements makes them feel more real and attainable. There’s no need to worry about whether the affirmation will come true because you’re telling yourself it already is. Be specific about your wording. Statements that affirm the feelings you want, such as “I am courageous,” are more impactful than statements that negate your current feelings, like “I am not scared.” Using Positive Affirmations With Kids The wonderful thing about positive affirmations is that there is no limit to their usefulness – especially when it comes to kids. Kids encounter so many different situations each day that test their skills and emotions. Here are just a few examples of times when you can try positive affirmations with your child: First thing in the morning, to start each day with a positive mindset At bedtime, to ease their transition to a restful sleep When facing a test at school or any other kind of personal challenge When feeling an overwhelming emotion, such as stress, anger, or sadness What Positive Affirmations Are Not Positive affirmations are a great tool to train the mind toward positive thinking and emotional regulation. But it is worth noting that all emotions are valid and serve a purpose. Kids should know that it is absolutely OK to feel whatever emotion they are feeling. It’s OK to be sad, angry or stressed, and it is OK to feel overwhelmed. Positive affirmations are not a tool to erase negative feelings altogether, since there are times when those emotions are healthy and necessary. This message can be especially helpful to kids, who tend to see things in black and white. That said, positive affirmations are great any time a person decides they’d like to transition to a new mindset. So next time you or your child feel the need to turn things around, give these tips a try. Sometimes, all it takes is a simple “I am OK right now.”